you judge me because i don't have an emotional life
because yours is full of tragedy
and that in your eyes
makes you real
where i am just
unkindly and without your maddening passions
mine however is just empty of feelings
because my experiences have shown me
that only when money is present in the dynamic
do people want ever to be with me
and so this emptiness
which you see as flaw and absence
is to my mind precisely why
my work is so beautiful
where you still are determined to claim
my life is non-existent
because for me if it's a choice between sex and thought
then thought every time
and if it's a choice
between fleeting touch
out of financial transaction
and a coke-ridden cash
or alternatively the imagineering of a new day
where a brand-new whirled arises out of nothing
then a brand-new whirled every single time
is what i will always choose
and if it's between living a life badly
as you all do
because if not
how come the world be like this ...
and so rhyming it fabulously as i do
and as i am clearly able to
there is really
no contest here
no contest whatsoever
dear friends
no contest ever
at all ... at all
no contest
remaining to this day
so please do not prevent me any more
(on condition of learning first
how to finally fuck
and perform as you demand i must)
from working in these things
that much more float my boat
for i have every right to be productive
without love
as indeed you show yourselves
so often to be
with what you blithely call
this thing you break into splintering pieces
and call sex and existence
without iota of kindliness or final utility
mil's page 